Writing is the air I breathe

It all started with a sudden realisation. The reason why its been getting so overwhelming is because I have all this feeling within me, and no real exit point for it.

Suddenly, a thought crossed my mind. Why not express it through writing?

"Oh yea! I used to do that...or did I?"

That got me thinking.

Waay back when I was young, I had a very active imagination. One night I'd be the mermaid turned fighter trying to save both land and sea worlds, next night I'd be a girl living on a ranch, and me and my favourite horse would due to some circumstances end up fighting against a bunch of VERY strong people.

The first time I rode a horse, my reaction wasn't "WHEE! I am on a horse!" It was, "She rode calmly, her natural talent with the animal guiding her actions."

My imagination has been a very big part of me. Writing has always been a part of me. The very first thing I wrote, I remember bouncing on my chair and being unable to contain my excitement, jumping onto my bed and bouncing and running around my room, all because there was an epic battle coming up and I was happy.

I wrote for myself, my own enjoyment, my own satisfaction. Now, reading that, I think of how crappy the technique I use was. But I can't help but enjoy reading it anyway.

But I started writing for approval, and stressed myself out thinking, this isn't the way, a lot of people will have criticisms for this and this.

Sure, I still enjoyed writing. But I began trying again and again to get that perfect formula, even though I know nothing is perfect.

It's just the freaking draft! That's why there are DRAFTS man...

So, I'm going to start a rewrite of Ruin Force.

And I'm going to do it my way.

I will enjoy myself. Who cares if the character is a mary-sue or gary-stu, as long as they're enjoyable? Who cares if the storyline is crazy, as long as it makes the reader imagine?

Because I'm not writing for those who find fault with everything. I am writing for those who enjoy reading, and also, for myself.

No pressure, that comes later once the ideas are all down.

For now, who cares about grammar, technique and all? As long as I can enjoy myself, as long as its not unbearable, the editing will finetune it.

I love writing.

There's something I've been wanting to say.
But I'm afraid...

Maybe when the time is right, or when I get the guts to.