Lost

Sometimes, I ask myself...What is my heart really feeling? And most of the time, I find no answer. And the only thing I can do is to keep smiling, and keep trying to figure out what exactly I'm feeling.

Beneath that smiling hyper bunny, there is the quiet contemplative side. It shows when I'm alone, but flees when company arrives. And then, I put on a smile, and act as if nothing was wrong.

Like what's happening to me right now. One of my friends got angry with me out of the blue, and I didn't even know why. Then, I spotted some pretty direct hints on her blog. It hurt, but day in, day out, I continued smiling. What else should I do? Crying won't help right? And yet, my friends all tell me that its not good to hold in your emotions.

Also, feelings are stirring deep within me, feelings that I thought were long gone, and all because of a simple encounter. What can I say? I don't want these feelings to exist, and yet, at the same time, I do. Its really quite confusing, and the only thing I can say is, I am at a loss.

Thank goodness for my great friends around me, who help me keep going.

Ja' ne! Gomen' ne, for making you guys sit through this.

[I'm jap inclined...shall download Kanji next time!]

-Ade-